In 2011 I was honored to take the top spot in the Viewer’s Choice award at the Seattle Erotic Art Festival for my Common Thread project. This year I hoped to continue my winning streak by once again grabbing this prize for the Ant Farm.

But my plans were thwarted.

For reasons unknown, SEAF decided to not allow the viewers to vote for their favorite artwork at the 2012 festival. And when I say “reasons unknown,” I mean unknown to me because it’s not like I actually took the time to ask anyone about it. Hell no, I have much more important things to do… like write this blog post.

Anyway, since SEAF has abdicated responsibility for collecting and tallying the wishes of the viewers, I have decided to take matters into my own hands. Since polling all the attendees at this point would extremely inconvenient for me, it quickly became obvious that I would have to construct a different method to accurately determine and serve the will of the people. Fortunately for the citizens of Seattle and beyond I was able to do just that, and I am now making the bold—some might rightly say courageous—move of declaring my art project the Ant Farm to be the winner of SEAF 2012. Or, as the press release should read:

David  is proud to announce that he has named his Ant Farm project to be the recipient of the “Super Awesome Award of Superior Achievement and Awesomeness” award at the 2012 Seattle Erotic Art Festival. There were no other winners.

Wow! I cannot tell you how thrilled I am to take the top spot two years in a row! This is a very humbling moment for me and I really need to acknowledge that it’s not just me, but also my unique talent and vision that got me here. I’m so happy that the esteemed committee recognized the need to assign this illustrious award to the rightful recipient, which is me. I will begin work on building a display case suitable to house such a distinguished trophy, right after I build the actual trophy.

I would like to thank everyone who came to SEAF this year for the sole purpose of viewing my project and I’m very happy that I can give you this opportunity to see the Ant Farm bestowed with all the accolades that I feel it deserves. Remember, when you follow your dreams, all my dreams come true.